Saturday, August 10, 2013

Kids are Weird II

Michelle's 6th Graders
Joseph: Teacher, I will tell my mom you are crazy and you will get sent back to America.

Jerome: "The new workers flew by the force of their pooping."

Monica: "For example, Cleo wanted to go to the toilet because her stomach hurt. when she started to poo, the bell rang, so she went to class. If the recess was long enough, Cleo could finish her poo."

Ice: "My pet peeve is toilet smell. It is a combination of poo and fart smell. It smells smelly, bad and very poisonous."

Dylan: "First of all, I want to tell you that I am very sorry, because I've been telling you that you are fat. Actually, you are not fat that much."

Michelle's Spanish Class
After asking "Where in the world do people speak Spanish?"
Dave: I don't know those other countries, they are not famous.


Olivia's 1st Graders
Stella: "Teacher, there is a baby in your belly and when it comes out it will go boom!"

Brad runs up, slams his forehead against Olivia's, bugs out his eyes and yells: "EYE CONTEST!"

While playing hangman, P _ _ _ _ _ s is written on the board
Lui: Penis teacher! Penis!
Olivia: What do you mean?
Lui: You know, penis, you eat it!
Oliva: You eat what? Peanuts?
Lui: Yes teacher! Penis!

Roy: Teacher! You English speaking so good! Where you learn English speaking?

Juwon: Tony is a mammal that can fly!
Olivia, thinking he is referring to a student in the class: Tony? Tony cannot fly.
Juwon: Yes teacher, Tony can fly!
Olivia: I don't understand.
Juwon: Tony that is Iron Man teacher!

Brad comes up, picks his nose, shows Olivia the booger on his finger: "English is what?"

Brian, referring to the new English teacher: "Does Tr. Danny speak English?"